iansie.com: gay london (updated)

East End Pubs

This is what I wrote in 1999: for extensive revisions, scroll to the end.

In direct contrast to the clubs of the West End, the gay pubs of London's East End are friendly, chatty and cheap (in all senses of the word.)

And the best way to see them is via that traditional English ceremony: the pub crawl. (If you don't understand the etymology of the phrase, just follow our suggested itinerary to its logical conclusion.)

We begin, early one evening, five minutes due north of Liverpool Street station at The Bar, bang next door to Chariots Sauna.

The Bar is very much not a typical east End pub: it's clean, smart and well-stocked. Indeed, if you get here much before five, you'll have difficulty knowing this is a gay bar: the (straight) owners have an annoying habit of tidying away all gay content during daylight hours, lest they lose the custom of the neighbouring City types or Shoreditch artisans.

The Bar is rarely crowded (except on one of their occasional party nights) and the warm summer evenings that bring a chatty crowd to the patio outside are few and far between. Looking around, you wonder whence the cash that supports this lavishness...

Pondering that, but asking no questions, have a pint of something groovy and foreign here and then walk, whilst you still can, further north to the church that features in the nursery rhyme ("I'll show that bitch, say the bells of Shoreditch.") Remark, as you pass, one of the last great cottages left in London on your right and, on your left, The Spiral Staircase (of which more later.)

Ahead of you stretches the Kingsland Road. Another day, if you have time on your hands, take a bus north from here to Abney Park Cemetery, and watch the languages change on the shopfronts: Hackney has always been a melting pot for successive waves of immigrants, a history of dealing with tribal allegiances that goes some way towards explaining the long tradition of gay pubs in the area.

To your left, beyond the railway bridge, you can see the black mausoleum now known as 333 Old Street, but previously known as the London Apprentice, now defunct long enough for everyone to agree that it once was a truly great gay pub. (Needless to say, that wasn't what they said at the time.)

Should you wish to explore the trendy straight fleshpots of newly-arty Shoreditch (and both The Barley Mow and The Bricklayer's Arms are nice pubs) or if you're here to visit the Ellipsis offices, do that now.

If you're an architecture fan, turn right before the church and coast round Arnold Circus, one of the earliest, and most striking, public housing estates in London. (I once had spectacular sex on the bandstand here as dawn rose over the rooftops but, alas, I cannot guarantee you the same good fortune.)

North-east of Shoreditch Church runs Hackney Road, and Columbia Road branches off to the right. On Sunday mornings this is a busy plant market and The Royal Oak (with its special market license) is a buzzy market pub, where groovy Shoreditch types mingle with gay clubbers who haven't quite got home yet.

For the rest of the week though, this is a quiet street, and a quiet pub, built on traditional (if slightly run-down) lines. There's a dog, a video screen, a pool-table. And that's about it. Nonetheless, this is the East End and we must take the rough with the smooth, even in the Pub That Taste Forgot, so have a polite quick half before moving on.

Several hundred yards north of the Royal Oak, back on the bend of the Hackney Road, you should be able to spot the Joiners Arms by its big rainbow flag. Like several other gay pubs on this tour, The Joiners rose out of the ashes of The London Apprentice and on a good night it can be just as busy, just as friendly, and just as difficult to make yourself heard.

In common with most other East End venues, The Joiners can occasionally take a while to get going of a night, possibly because it has a growing reputation for the chill-outs that start in the early hours of the morning and run through till noon, specifically geared to a mixed gay/straight post-club crowd that (as the title of one chill has it) Can't Stop, Won't Stop.

So, assuming that this isn't a party night, and that you haven't fallen into casual conversation with an off-duty rent-boy, a drug-dazed dj, or a drunken dyke, spend this next pint at The Joiners considering how far you've already come from the manicured elegances of The Bar. Just half a mile north and several cultures away already. And it's still early.

When you ask one of the (cute) bar staff to phone you a cab to the Cock and Comfort, don't be dissuaded if they grin and say "sod-all cock and precious little comfort"; that's just professional rivalry.

The Cock, half a mile to the south-east, offers another interesting contrast. The predominantly local clientele are a little older, and a little more traditional (more than a few of them are refugees from the 'headache-music' at The Joiners.) There are no straights, no pool-table and no dog. Plus: there's drag.

Time was you couldn't walk into any East End pub, let alone a gay one, without stumbling across some aged drag-queen and her ancient routine. ("Don't clap! It's an old building.") But drag, like camp, is a dying art and The Cock and Comfort can pick and choose from amongst the limited number of stalwart survivors. And, by and large, they choose well.

If you like the Cock, feel free to stay: they're (officially!) open till 2am on Fridays and Saturdays. If you're a very quick drinker, or walker, or crawler, you may still have time to investigate some of the other gay pubs in the neighbourhood: The Ship, The British Prince. The Black Horse or The Three Crowns.

But if it's a Friday, a Saturday or a Sunday, double back down Bethnal Green Road to the Spiral Staircase, a venue which brings new meaning to the term 'dive bar'. (Take the spiral staircase at a run and see what we mean.) Newly re-decorated, the Spiral's gutter-appeal has suffered from a slight fit of respectability in recent months, an upgrade that its dedicated late-night clientele will no doubt redeem in due course: drag-queens, market-traders, dodgy vicars and terminal sluts: they're all here, and they're all blind drunk.

If, on the other hand, it's a Wednesday, head a mile further south from the Cock to The White Swan on Commercial Road. There may have been a time when burly dockers drank here, but those days have long gone: nowadays it's the standard East End mix of hairdressers and bus-conductors, plus a sprinkling of closet yuppies from the nearby Docklands developments lending a little, but not too much, tone.

This large and popular pub has a revolving menu of trashy theme nights plus a regular late license. Wednesday is Amateur Strip Night, it's popularity recently boosted by the all-night opening of Sailors Sauna five doors away.

Should you be tempted to get up and show people what you've got, don't let me stop you: you're a long way from home and besides no-one will remember in the morning. Especially you - now do you see why we call it a Pub Crawl?

Re-reviewed 19/7/01:
Sadly, The Bar is now closed, its space artfully merged into Chariots sauna. Even sadder, the cottage is closed too. 333 now has a regular gay presence once again, the 'LA3', every Sunday till late.
The Cock and Comfort became officially 'un-gay' in July '01 - which is not to say that it's gay clientele will disappear overnight.
I suspect that The Joiner's Arms has lost its rainbow flag, though not its gay clientele; the chill-outs still happen (at a slightly less riotous pace) and the whole place is scheduled for an extensive refurbishment this summer.
I never went to The Three Crowns but it seems to have disappeared without trace. The Ship (a cosy local) runs a quiz night on Wednesdays, making a pleasant pairing with The White Swan's amateur strip event later in the evening. (Reports from The White Swan often appear in Blogadoon, usually on a Thursday after the night before.)
The Spiral has gone from strength to strength under new management but its future looks slightly unpredictable in the light of the huge rent increases in burgeoning Shoreditch; go whilst you still can.

Re-reviewed 01/03/04:
LA3 recently moved out of East London altogether (see revised listing here). The Joiner's revamp worked very well, and the pub currently hosts a particular pleasant free-entry mini-club-night every Saturday till late (sometimes very late). Sunday mornings at the Royal Oak became more and more rowdy but the noisiest segment of the post-club crowd has now moved on to The Victoria, just round the corner. I suspect The Ship has shut, now that it's drag-queen landlord, Del Rio, has moved to Spain. The White Swan is thriving. And The Spiral Staircase has closed for good.

The George and Dragon, next door to Shoreditch church, is run largely by gay men but, whilst distinctly gay-friendly, is not really a gay bar as such. (Cute men, though, and decor to die for.) Sunday evenings at the George are especially popular, so much so that you probably want to avoid them.

Re-reviewed 31/03/04:
I'm told The Ship is still very much open, especially on a Sunday evening. The Oak is widely described as 'no longer gay' - whatever that means. See also Charlies on Globe Road.

Re-reviewed 21/06/04:
LA3 is now back at 333 (do keep up) which also hosts Dirty Fairy on Thursday nights, till late.

Re-reviewed 19/11/04:
LA3 has moved south of the river, to Fire in Vauxhall. A night called LA-X took over 333 for a month or so, but is now defunct. Not sure about Dirty Fairy. Keep an eye out for something called Trailer Trash, underneath the bridge on Kingsland Road. The Lux Bar in Hoxton Square on a Sunday night is also worth trying. And there's a deeply unofficial thing known as Garry's, somewhere on Kingsland Road. More news when I have it.

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